i'm going to start keeping a 'coffee log.'

one thing i never seem to be able to negiotiate with my body, is, is, reaching the point of coffee consumption where i am hyper and the thoughts are coming so beautifully fast, but where i don't get shaky and where acid doesn't audibly gnaw my insides. i mean, we've talked, we've peer-mediated, but every time i express a desire for that tantalizing beverage either i find it difficult to form complete thoughts, let alone coherent sentences in my sleepy, itchy-eye state, or i pace around, peeing every ten minutes, getting dizzy if i look as if i may at some point in the future try to stand up quickly. it's happened before, on rare occasions, where it is the blissful caffeine high without the speed-like side effects. i will find a way, dammit. i will conduct a series of highly Scientific and Professional experiments, complete with consent forms and independent variables. i'll be right back with the results of that. right back, i swear. as soon as my hands stop shaking.